Emo reflection post

public class 11032010{

public void brad(blogger){

*sigh* so i went to a lesbian gay bi tran support group thingy, hoping to get some of my personal questions answered and stuff, but it defiantly wasn't what i expected. I didn't say a damn thing, because i was so scared, but once i got the nerve to say something, they were on a new topic. *sigh* really not a people person. Also, they're also like, way beyond my level of "gay". like, i'm level 1, and they're all level 50+. They're are REALLY UPSET, that people don't see them as gay. And this one chick was upset that she was going out with a straight man. I'm sitting there going, "DOES THIS REALLY MATTER??" but oh well. i guess i just won't understand. ANYWAY, to the main point of this post, during THE ENTIRE TIME, i was thinking about Brad. The only guy i loved. I regret telling him everything. Because after I told him everything, he cut off communication with me. And not only that, but he also stops communicating with my friends that are friends with him. I feel that it's all of my fault. If i didn't come out to him and asked him out...none of this would be happening, we would still be friends and my friends would be still be friends with him. I am literally crying throughout this post and taking many breaks because i just feel so horrible from what i've done to him and the friends that we share. It's almost been a year since i told him EVERYTHING. And I regret telling him. I'm the very reason why he destroyed friendship. He's probably so scared of me, and doesn't want to even think about me. I hate myself for even trying. I just wish, I can see him again, and tell him that I'm sorry and that this shouldn't ruin our friendship. Because that's all i really want again, our friendship. He was my best best friend ever...and i miss him terribly.

}

}